Blues Players facilities uproar

Current dressing room facilities at Cardiff Blues

Cardiff Blues players are reaching breaking point over the standard of their training and preparation facilities, it emerged this week.

The rag understands major unrest is brewing among the squad. They are annoyed with what’s on offer compared to other groups like Hollywood actors and members of the Royal family.

Nicky Robinson, number 10 said “It’s a disgrace… I haven’t even got my own dressing room… How they expect me to perform under these conditions is unbelievable… Look at the state of my roots… I look like a commoner…” he was too upset to continue.

His brother, Orange-lips, chipped in from under his tanning bed “Well I’m not playing again until they get me a personal hairdresser and a manicurist.”

The blues are part of plans to develop a newstate-of-the-art training complex with the New Theatre in Cardiff and a hair saloon in Roath.

Dai Youngster, coach and part-time actor, played down the matter, but did admit during a nice lunch of champagne; oysters and pate on toast while over looking the bay, there have been mutterings “There’s a bit of frustration amongst the players… for example there’s no place to put their make-up on before a game… and on several occasions in the winter… the boys actually got their hair wet… this plays murder with their split ends”.